Tuesday, August 01, 2006

 

HEAT INDUCED MEANDERING THOUGHTS FROM GEEZERDOM

Check out the headline directly above the RollingStone logo. If this doesn't disturb you , you are not paying attention! This article, plus one on the Connecticut senate race, make this weeks RS a must read. The article on Led Zeppelin is excellent too!

The heat index hit 112 degrees here today. A lot of people are complaining about this heat wave. Not me! First, it is a great excuse to go to the beach instead of doing housework (I'm goin tomorrow night!). But more importantly, the number of mostly naked women running around my neighborhood roughly doubles for every 10 degrees of heat. At this point, even the most conservative of women seem to have given up on modesty in favor of comfort. Case in point... There is a very attractive fortyish woman who moved in down the street a few years ago. By day, she generally wears business suits with skirt just below the knees. By night, generally khakis and a work shirt. In three years, I had never seen her knees, until this week. Suddenly, she has discovered the joys and comfort of men's boxers and tank tops. She hasn't had any restraining undergarments on in at least 5 days. And it turns out she has fabulous legs!

A walk downtown reveals a sea of sports bras, halters, and hip hugging, cheek exposing short shorts. Not to mention myriad of buxom black ladies in a rainbow of backless sundresses. Ah, the summer in the city. John Sebastian should write a song about it!

Did I mention that I came within about a tenth of a second of being just another traffic statistic Saturday? I was driving east to meet Carol and Garry for our canoe outing, when a large, loaded dump truck apparently lost its brakes while coming down a side street. The driver attempted to turn into the westbound lane, but tires smoking, he still came all the way across into my lane and onto the shoulder. I somehow managed to take a detour across someone's front lawn, but I still have no idea how I missed this guy. It was so close (how close was it?), I have a white paint scratch on my drivers side rear view mirror. I keep having nightmares where all I see is the grill of a Peterbuilt flash in front of my eyes. Needless to say, my beer consumption went way up Saturday! When I told my daughter about it that night, her reaction was, "you're a professional driver, you're supposed to be able to do that." I must admit, I was underwhelmed by her reaction!
TIME TO GRAB ANOTHER BREW AND CHECK OUT THE NEIGHBORHOOD! See ya soon.... TGWB

Comments:
GWB, glad you didn't depart us. Be careful out there! Out of control trucks are dangerous. But then again, so are out of control scantily clad women. :-)
 
yes, but the latter are a much more enjoyable way to get in trouble!
 
Jeebus!

GWB! I'm just catching my breath after that horrendous near miss.

Glad you're okay.
 
Wow, that's quite a scare (Iran and your near-miss). Why do they call it a near miss anyway? If you nearly drown, that means you didn't drown. If you nearly missed, doesn't that mean that you hit?

Anyway, I know our administration wants to go after Iran, but they have no resources to do so. I is disturbing to me...
 
Jeez - that is as close of a call as I've heard of without actually being in the accident. As far as the heat, you're the only person I know of who can see the bright side. Our weather has leveled off, so women are back to wearing their norm. :-P
 
Laura - excellent point! It really is a near hit!

Notta - Living within a block or so of three excellent, air conditioned bars an a half hour from the beach makes it much easier to see the silver lining in a heat wave. Especially since all those nearly naked women end up in the same places!
 
Geez GWB! I feel dirty after reading about all those ladies! ;-) We don't have anyone going out in this heat (heat index 115) and there is no break at the beach. The heat wave is supposed to leave us by tomorrow thankfully!

Glad you're a professional driver btw.
 
I, too, have had a near-death experience with a Peterbilt. Nothing scares the shit out of you like looking in the rear-view mirror and seeing nothing but a Peterbilt grill!
Did you need clean underwear? ;)
 
no, but i did stop to check!
 
OK, I grudgingly admit there are some advantages to heat (lotsa shirtless men). ;D
 
Now THAT'S the spirit!
 
We can't have you checking out, your profile will end up on MyDeathSpace.com... Creepy. When I was a parts delivery driver, I had a few hits. I got hit by a tire, and rear ended by some asshole trying to pass on the shoulder when I was waiting to make a left turn.
 
I had a close call a week or so ago. I was on the 401 driving west into Toronto behind a guy towing a boat. He hit a bump and a canoe paddle bounced up from his boat about 20 feet in the air. I stole a quick glance in my rear view mirror, just long enough to determine that I could safely brake and then I braked hard enough to the paddle landed just in front on my car instead of through my windshield. I safely ran over the paddle. I don't think the guy even knew it flew off. The whole business happened in a split second, and if I hadn't been alert, I could have had a paddle smash my window and cause who knows what.
 
Yeah SME, but there's also a LOT of guys running around in black socks with sandals. :(
 
Whew! What great reflexes you have..
Stay cool!
 
Glad to hear you are doign fine and not smushed. You too Mister A.

I was laughing so much at your neighbours new found comfort or need for less clothing. You lucky dog you!

I totally want to read that Rolling Stone issue, I'm on it! And yes, that upper headline makes me sick to my stomach.

Take care,
Candy
 
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