THE GREAT WHITE BEAR

Okay, it is no big secret that I am not a big fan of Christmas. I especially hate having to listen to 6 weeks of unrelenting, insippid Chrismtas Carols 24 hours a day. I mean, I never cared for Andy Williams when he was a pop star, I don't want to hear him sing the same few songs half a dozen times a day!

To me there are only 2 good Christmas songs. Check that.... one good Christmas song and one good Hannakuh song. John Lennon's HAPPY CHRISTMAS, and Adam Sandler's HANNAKUH SONG. Sandler's song contains one of my all time favorite lyric lines: "Paul Neman is half Jewish, Goldie Hawn is too. Put them both together, what a FINE LOOKIN JEW!" Which got me to thinking about my all time favorite lyric lines.

1. "Get your tongue out of my mouth, cause I'm kissin you good bye" - Ray Stevens

2. "The weather is here, I wish you were beautiful" - Jimmy Buffet

3. "I tell you duct tape is the answer, in a little silver roll. It can mend the widest crack, patch the deepest hole. I put duct tape on my sneakers when they start to fall apart. Since my baby left me, I'm wearing duct tape on my heart" - Joel Mabus (Duct Tape Blues)

4. "Will there be Mogen David in heaven? It's the answer we all want to know! Will there be Mogen David in heaven, sweet Jesus? Well if not, who the hell wants to go?" Gatlin Bros. (Midnight Choir)

5. "Imaginary lovers never turn you down. When all the others turn you away, they're around" - Atlanta Rhythem Section (Imaginary Lover)

6. "I was drunk the day my mom got out of prison. And I went to pick her up in the rain. But before i could get to the staion in my pick up truck, she got run over by a damned old train." - Steve Goodman/John Prine (The Perfect Country Western Song)

7. "And he sideswiped fifteen neat parked cars, clipped off thirteen telelphone poles. Hit two houses, uprooted big trees, and ran across seven people. It was then he lost his head, not to mention an arm or two, before he stopped." - Harry Chapin (30,000 lbs Of Bananas)

8. "If you like Gerald Ford as much as you like Betty. You think a field of corn looks mighty pretty. And you'd rather go to hell than to New York City. Then your hopelessly midwestern" - Joel Mabus (Hopelessly Midwestern)

Okay, so what are your favorite lines?